Been hearing too many people say that the secret of a happy life is when you learn to simplify it. To aid that view, I made sure that I went hammer and tong to make that feel true- by reading up on the subject, by going on the net and simply by living it. I have always been open to views, spews and actual good advice given to me from time to time, by man woman and child. So as usual I get to share a bit of the booty.

Of course some people make drastic life changes in order to actually feel like they have altered their lifestyles. But that, in my book is just not needed, because then it feels like one has given up too much in the effort to have it all. The  primary objective for most of us would be to have more time for our own life dreams and for the people we love.

One of the dichotomies we face in our common day lives is the fact that since our lives are so complicated, we have no time to actually look at our inner issues. It clearly does not mean that we have to up and move to the countryside, and change all our thoughts radically. The challenge here is to create a simpler life right in the town we live in, with the people we care about.

Most of us already have the good life, but we just don’t have the time and energy to enjoy it. The first step towards living that simple life that we all look forward to, is to get rid of all the accumulation of possessions that we have. Some say it helps to even move to smaller, easier to maintain homes. Funny I see people trying to do the exact opposite. I for one would love to live in a larger home. The needs of living in an urban world I guess.

Cutting back on daily and weekly household routines, like cooking, grocery shopping, housecleaning, yard maintenance, errand running etc, would in turn give us time to watch the sunset, read a book, and spend time with friends and family. But the actual simplification is all so relative. Some believe that by getting rid of their supposed valuables via a charity auction is the way.

Some by getting rid of seven houses to retain one could be a way. Some by merely scheduling their work hours to the amount that equals the adequate income that they need, feel that may just be the way. Basically simplifying only means that we should be able to balance our need for a satisfying career, to our desire to spend time with our families, and our innate desire to nourish our souls.

Sometimes, I wonder what Simple Living actually means to most people. For many, alterations in their lifestyles, usually brings significant relief. But leaving everything behind to move to a cabin in the woods is not necessarily simple or convenient. Tempting as it may seem, it is definitely not realistic. Also sometimes in the midst of trying to simplify things, life can get pretty overwhelming. Now that is something we did not bargain for.

For instance if one is changing jobs, or reducing ones income, letting go of clutter, cleaning up relationships, dealing with inner issues, or just changing our long established habit patterns, at that point everything can seem pretty complicated.

So then what does one do? The stumbling block of living a simpler life is our unwillingness to change some of the stuff that we do. For example, most of us have this inherent need to maintain our homes to certain standards of cleanliness, organization, efficiency and so-called style. For the longest time, we have been made to feel inadequate, incompetent, insecure, dissatisfied and socially unacceptable, if we did not adhere to the given rules.

But now we need to use our willingness and use our minds to decide what we need and what we don’t. When we are bang in the middle of a complicated life, we think it is close to impossible to slow down, like running by the clock, we feel exhausted moving ninety miles an hour so to speak. But that’s just initial skepticism.

Changing an exercise regime, spending more time in nature (not just watching the discovery channel), creating some time for solitude, are easier things to tackle, and can give us immediate relief. We can take baby steps- to change our expectations, learn to forgive, get out of debt, thus reducing the complexities in our lives.

Do we really want to be a part of a statistic that says 65% of people do in the spare time what they really don’t want to do? So many of us  fritter our lives away by aimlessly going for meaningless social engagements, luncheons, overworking on weekends, and put our actual desires on a back burner. Here is where the simplifying comes into use.

We could actively make a choice to free up our time to do things that actually mean something to us and then of course arrange to have them done. Having twenty four hours in a day seems very deceptive. It sounds like a great deal of time. But realistically if one works eight hours and sleeps eight hours, we actually have only 8 more for anything else.

What we don’t realize is that we actually need more because to merely keep up with spouses who need our attention, kids who need our love, employers who demand our souls, homes that take our energy, friendships that require nurturing and not to forget our inner cravings that are screaming to be met. Even a 36 hour day would seem less!

We often get suckered into work situations, social commitments, volunteer obligations, and other activities that complicate our lives. We stay in them longer than we need to, because they look good on paper, because they sound good in conversations, or simply because they meet our or someone else’s expectations of the kind of things that maybe we should be doing.

Here one needs to take a good look at life and rearrange one’s priorities. In learning to make choices, we learn to simplify our lives. We have to learn the art of saying no, and also give up being on automatic pilot. We have to stop rushing through our days, taking time off to change gears, making it possible for us to get into the habit of being aware and alive each moment.

For example, take an afternoon off, exercise at a different time, in a different place maybe? Unplug your phone for a whole day, or week? And finally how do you deal with people who just don’t understand? Sometimes people do not accept the changes in your life simply because it threatens their lives. Let it not throw you off guard or into confusion.

One can only say that it takes courage to buck the tide but once you start experiencing the freedom that comes with change, then it will be easy to move on without any explanations to anybody.

Very simply the verdict of the day! By slowing down, by simplifying, by breaking down some of our consuming and spending habits, by teaching our kids simple pleasures, we can create for ourselves a beautiful, happy and fulfilling life, and guess what? We don’t have to then work as hard to maintain it!

Previously published in the Sindhian